Life is weird.

I haven’t updated much lately because things have been so weird.  Plus, I’ve been in more of a blurb, one line kinda update mood, and Twitter is much better for that.  (Why is LJ telling me that every other word in this post is misspelled?)  I keep meaning to do a post that’s somewhat productive, but that just hasn’t happened lately.  My brain has been pretty fried. First from a round of edits, then from messing with outlines, now from trying to iron out a new project.

I’ve been horribly slacking on the writing this year.  I think a large part of that was the uncertainty.  I’m still trying to nail that idea that hits me as ‘right’ for the next book.  I think that’s a big part of my problem.  With WE, I knew that was the book I wanted to write.  But now, I’m hitting doubts about "What if this sounds just like WE" or "I can’t do this, it’s too derivative of some other book."  I liked WE because it was similar to books that were out there, but I thought I did something familiar, yet different.  It was a nice spin.

My goal for the time being is that if a project strikes my fancy, I’ve got to get 10,000 words down on it to see what I think.  I did that with the Wino project (abandoned, btw), and hit the 10,000 word point and realized the whole thing was too damn depressing.  It was also depressing to write.  I think that was my choice of mood music and lack of a good antagonist.  There was nothing pushing the story forward.  And as a result every scene just started to take on a "hey, look at THIS weird incident" vibe.

The worst part is I’ve got about six different ideas.  Settling on one?  Way harder.  So I’ve been trying to open myself up to more different forms of inspiration, waiting for that switch to flip and for me to get swallowed up in someone’s story.  It hasn’t happened yet, but I’m remaining optimistic.

My goal for the year was to finish WE and write two more books.  I’ve….well, if you count all the false starts I’ve made, I’ve written enough to count towards one book (collectively).  But I got out of the habit, and it’s been a struggle to get back into it.  Work’s been a large part of it.  Most weeks I’m working six days, and staying in the store on my breaks.  Plus, with the economy the way it is, server wages suck.

This has been one of the most bizarre years of my life.  Seriously.  Way different than I expected it to be.  Higher highs, and almost lower lows.  (My late teens still takes the cake for the lows, though).  I was going to do a Thanksgiving post about all the stuff I’m thankful for, but everyone else did them way better than I would have.  So I’ll sum up.

I’m just thankful to have a job when many people don’t right now, I’m thankful my family has helped me keep my head afloat when the economy tanked, I’m thankful I’ve got an agent who believes in my writing, and I’m thankful for the friends who’ve been there for me when I needed someone to talk/vent to.

Okay, now I’m off to write on the new project.  Scott’s "Paranormal Bromance" novel.


4 thoughts on “Randomness

  1. I was wondering about why LJ was doing that, and why Google Docs was doing that, and discovered that it was actually Firefox applying the red underlines. In some recent update they lost english contractions from their spellcheck data.

    Could you be experiencing the same stupid? I fixed it by turning off the spellcheck.

  2. It’s good to see you post again. I totally understand about not being able to nail down your next project. I’ve been in limbo too ever since finishing my last WIP. Maybe your agent can help you decide on a project she thinks would be right for your career? I don’t have one of those (an agent…or a writing career (yet)), so I’m definitely jealous there. 🙂

    • I think my only problem is that I’m stuck in finding that perfect fit. The last book, it was this obsessive need to write it all down. Now I’ve got like six ideas (I’m not kidding, it’s literally around six), but none of them is really screaming to me that their story needs to be told. And that’s the part that’s bugging me. None of them reminds me this is supposed to be fun.

      Yeah, I feel a little stupid grumbling about my problems when I’ve been lucky enough to get as far as I have (so far). But then I think – if I were someone else, I’d want to know what people in different stages of their writing career are thinking.

  3. Lege-

    Hang in there…something will click. You have an amazing talent.

    It’s good to be thankful, especially in these times.


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